If you are ever have the misfortune of meeting me in person. You’ll find that not only do I set the trend for weirdos all around the globe but also am a complete nightmare to hang around with. Why I have more friends than all my siblings put together, is simply beyond me. This, I suspect, is the reason why I haven’t been allowed to join the introvert club just yet (Regulations state that no more and no less than one friend = yourself).
I mean, OK, am I really that bad? If you ask my closest, most trusted and relied upon friend, my bosom buddy, my chum, my pal –
According to that guy, I promised him that I’d pay half the bill for the paint-balling match we had organized for 10, but I ducked out near the end, complaining I really had to go to the bathroom – and I never came back.
In my defense, I have a tiny bladder – and I felt that back home was the place to be. Instincts, you gotta follow ’em.
A guy at the mall thought I was being an impudent jerk when I told him that if he shows even a hair’s width of more ass he could easily land a job as a gay-magnet.
Truth be told, women would give anything to have a cleavage like the one he was showing off – in a twisted sort of way.
I remember a cousin and me playing billiards once. He was going on and on about something his girlfriend did – or didn’t do, to be more precise (she forgot his birthday, and here I thought girls were supposed to be sensitive about that sort of stuff o.0). I don’t know why but I found it amusing at best. I could sense that he was on the verge of tears. I tried to feel sorry for him, I really did, but I just wasn’t getting that vibe when you know when the situation is serious. So I just kept on teasing him. Again – instincts are everything. In the end, the club manager had to kick us both out. Few people can handle others’ misery (Not me). Fewer still, manage to keep their temper with heartless bastards. Apparently he is not one of them. Go figure.