Diary Without Pages

Trivia I find Ignored

No Name


We have casual chats with people we see everyday, like the guy standing next to the hot dog stand every time you are there. Or the cleaning lady at the hospital you visit regularly, or the sweet girl at the canteen whose sneeze is like an elephant blowing its trumpet. They all have one thing in common…


I saw the sky get smaller and smaller as I gasped for breath. Next thing I knew I was rolling on the ground. My hands clenching my stomach. A mixture of grass and mud plastered. I felt my face muscles constrict, my legs thrashing like a man on his death bed…

15 minutes earlier…

I was sitting in the lawn, shading my face with one hand and trying to read something written on a bit of paper with the other. The sunlight was comforting for a while. But only for a while; then it just got plain hot. I shifted to make my back face the sunlight. A reflexive shudder ran down my spine, as if to acknowledge the welcome change in temperature.

My eyes darted around a bit, then settled on the shadow approaching me from behind. I immediately recognized the great hairstyle (bald). A friend’s friend. The bald look suites him, he’s one of few who can pull it off. He settled next to me, his expression, serious.

When he spoke, there was a pleading note in his voice.

“You know that guy who hangs around me a lot after class, the one with the braces still on?”

“Yeah, course, he’s glued to your group 24/7.”

“Yeah, well see, the things is, its his birthday tomorrow….”


“A couple of friends of mine decided to throw him a party of sorts, seeing as how he has no relatives in town and all.”

“I’m listening.”

“Well, the thing I wanted to say is, umm….the thing is…”

My back was getting uncomfortably warm by now. I had trouble staying in one spot for more than 5 seconds. Seeing the expression on my face, he thought I was getting tired of the conversation (which I was, truth be told), so he jumped to the point.

“The thing is we don’t know what to write on the cake.” he blurted.

I stopped fidgeting.

“Come again.”

“I said, we don’t know what to write on his cake!!”

“You want to write a witty comment on his birthday cake?!!”

“His name!! we don’t know his friggin’ name!!!!


It took a while, but then it hit me. At first I thought he was retarded or something, but then it started to make sense. The more it made sense the funnier it got.

Author: Hamza

A college student of 18. With sarcasm as my voice and a proud disregard for rules, I'm looking to shake up the world a little - without sounding incredibly cheesy.

26 thoughts on “No Name

  1. but its sad…. in fact very sad.

  2. Worse when you have conversations with the people month after month and can’t remember their names…

    • I can only imagine…
      “What’s your name again?”
      “Seriously!!? I’ve been your personal assistant for 6 months! and you don’t know my name. That’s it, I quit.”

      • Oh, at that point I’d have an annoying nickname for them. And check their paperwork for their real name.
        Also, after 6 months, they;d know that about me already and would have to be used to it. Or not last six months…

        • First day at work….
          “Sir, nice to finally meet you. My name is John.”
          “Welcome to the firm, Ron, we have set up a cubicle for your on the ground floor and don’t even think about arguing with me over your name, we’ve got you in contract, you got that? Shaun?!
          “Y- Yes sir!”

  3. Can’t believe I forgot – craziest Carl ever, from Llamas with Hats.

  4. Haha, oh god this happens way to often! I can’t tell you how many people that I hang out with on an almost daily basis and I haven’t got the slightest clue about what their name is!

  5. Last week, my work friend and I were at a fast food restaurant waiting in line at the counter when that work friend saw her former coworker who was in front of us. They excitedly hugged each other, exchanged their how-have-you-been’s, while I got shoved in one corner. Work friend was aware of that but didn’t bother to do anything, let alone introduce me to her friend, all because she didn’t remember the name. And she didn’t want her friend to find out that she had indeed forgotten.

    My sister, although she never forgets our names, always call me by my other sister’s name and my other sister my name. It seems incurable. We just shrug it off.

    • My mother has an annoying habit of mixing up the names of her sons. It happens so often its not even funny anymore. Dad often says,” God woman! these are your children, memorize their names for crying out loud.”

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